THE BLOODY DAYS OF OUR FUCKED UP LIVES

Saturday, 14 November 2009

Monday, 26 October 2009

  • My children.

    Oh yeah forgotten to update about my cats
    When I planned to do so on June
    after so many months past. lol.
    Munyi and Munyu had all grown up,
    But they're now much bigger than in all these
    pictures since it was taken on June.

    Aww ain't they sweet and adorable. :3

    This was random, An 'O' i made while smoking and capture
    it with my handphone camera. lol. Back to my sygs again.



    The Toilet Guardians.

    Meet Munyi. :)

    Feeding time.

    Mmm fresh tits juice. Sedap! (Y)

    Keliru.

    Confused face.
     
    Biol.


    I'm gay, look my leash is pink!

    Munyu.

     
    Suprised expression.


    Yeah I know they're cute, looking whose the breeder/owner.
    Heheh. LOL! Well they're not any special breed, mixed,
    siamese, burmese, flew off from thailand, greenland, auckland
    or whatever countries or planet. I don't own any special breed cats
    unlike most people do. The mum is a under the block cat when I took
    her in. and the newborn babies are from my house, my room. If
    whoever ask where are they from, I'm gonna answer
    "Oh these are fucking special breed, born in my room. :D"
    LOL?
    So yeah I love them, they're my children, my small family.
    Hahaha a subtitute for girlfriends.
    Having them living in my house makes me smile everyday
    making my empty house even livelier along with the smell of
    shits and piss in the bathroom. -.-


    Don't have a cat?
    Go grab one downstairs now!
    xD



Tuesday, 13 October 2009

  • GO FOR A BMW !

    Guess I'll be riding a BMW in the end of this month.

    Don't ask where the hell I got it as I'm selling off my beloved bike.
    You have served me well.

    Suited with my GodHAND-like(lol!) handling escaping countless near-misses
    giving me thrilling exciting adrenaline moments(the joy of riding),
    recklessness on the roads/highways, flowing through traffic jams
    like fucking water, destroying both front and rear fender of classy car
    (    Fucking mercedes that's what you get when you kissed my bike's ass,
    now my insurance won't decrease for a year. -_-")    , taking down a super-4
    on a pick-up race at traffic junction, making shortcut that other road/sportsbike
    can't do, going over a hump and fast speed not needing to slowing fucking down,
    longest wheelie for 3seconds. What's else there is to it to add more.
    Well I'm still alive and kicking i must say not having any single fatal injuries
    risk of taking my life away throughout my whole riding experience.
    These fingers aren't just to please women. LOL.
    Definitely miss riding a dirtbike for now which feels like
    floating-through-the-air experience that no other bikes can give.
    Damn. I'll just stick to BMW now.










    *Bus MRT Walk*
    Hehehe.


Saturday, 03 October 2009

  • Hari Raya, Unfavourable.



    I felt that I shouldn't have been in any one of the Raya pictures.
    But I have no regrets. Just looking at it makes me smile.
    I'm happy for this year but I hope there won't be anymore
    for the coming years for me to be in it. Yeah I'm so selfish.
    Hahaha NOT.
    Couldn't bring myself to ask for forgiveness to anyone this year.
    From the ones that I treated so badly for the past fews years ago,
    I can't bare to face them. Such a pussy, so 'lick me till I'm saturated.'
    That's taken from a quote I found. lol.
    Maybe because of that, I'm losing myself to hatred.
    Maybe in one Hari Raya in the future to come,
    I'm ready to forgive and be forgiven for my worst-ever wrongdoings.
    And puasa/fast fully for a complete month too. Heh.

    I need guidance.




Sunday, 13 September 2009

  • The lover of the two years past.

    I saw her. I think it's her but I wasn't sure.
    I swear it's her. I can't be wrong, no doubt.
    Glad she's doing well and good.
    That what I wish for.
    I can tell that she's grown and much different than before.
    The only person I've kept close to the heart till now and ever.
    She wouldn't feel the same way as me. But hell, I'm happy
    and satisfied enough. Various people even my mum ask me something in
    malay that goes like this, "It seems like years I've never ever seen you
    with a girlfriend so far, so when are you gonna find an eligible fiancee-to-be?"
    I was tongue-tied.
    "I can help to matchmake you with women just right for you."
    One of my mum's friend said.
    She had many successful attempts of matchmaking couples.
    Fuck I prefer finding for myself. It's like fucking spitting at my pride as
    a male who can't find his very own mate to mate and have cute-looking with.
    LOL. Hahaha ignore the mating part but the humiliation part is true. Well I
    have nothing to say about this, just let time flows to that very eventful meeting
    to come. Oh yeah somehow I'm doing the waiting instead of searching.
    That's how my ex-lover met me and I fell in dreamy love from head-to-toes with
    her. Heh such a lazy-ass perangai gemok me. I'm used to that way for years
    cause nobody can penetrate through this fucking thick barrier of mine's.
    Don't believe that I can make someone happy in the state I am still in now.
    There's no one who can take care of me but I can take care of myself.

    Nak step mane nye solo-molo sial betol
    Hahaha.




Thursday, 10 September 2009

  • Untitled.

     

    Thank you Maryana for the plaids/cornrow and
    not minding me wasting much of your time and energy.
    Heh. :D Next target, natural dreadlocks w/o extentions.
    Hopefully one day..


    P.S. Anybody needs a Yamaha WR200     dirtbike?
    In a tight financial fixed right now.
    But the dirtbike's pride will still forever be at heart.
    But I wouldn't mind having one of these







Sunday, 23 August 2009

  • Shit happens.

    I've been down with bad luck/omen for the past few days
    right before the start of the holy glorious Ramadhan month.
    Seems to me like this all happens as judgment from above for all my
    accumulated bad/evil sins since the beginning of the year.
    I believe.
    This won't be the end of unfortunate events that's gonna befall on me.
    I have lost my faith, for now. Well, I'm no innocent goody-goody pure
    type of person as what people would think. I'm blessed with evil and dirty
    sins.     I can feel that my punishments for my deeds still on-going till now.
    Till I'm clear of all mishaps, maybe then I'll start believing. Just maybe..
    There is still no one to guide me through this. I wouldn't celebrating
    this year much-awaited Hari Raya again for another year round.
    A joyous season of     forgiveness, gatherings of family and friends.
    Not that I don't really care/bother about it.
    Like I said, I don't deserve it.
    Myself/my family here can't be compared with any other normal malay family in
    Singapore be it my friend's or others. I'm incomparable. take a walk in my shoes.
    It will same as every other year, still never deserving forgiveness by relatives
    here, anyone or someone. Feels like I don't fit to be living or even belong here
    in Singapore somehow. A place that I belong to huh. There's a probability
    in the few coming years that I'll be stateless if I don't do something about it now.
    And there were many occasions that I felt like I was meant to die
    in the places I've been. (Not because of road accidents)
    But I managed to avoid it due to luck. Be it at my workplace or anywhere.
    But I'll try my best to stay alive and well. I'm not afraid of death.
    Wouldn't want my mom to lose her only son all alone here in Singapore.
    Hahaha sorry I don't mean to say much depressing negative crap.
    But currently I don't find joy with everything around me.
    Things always get fucked up and i ended up regretting make the
    wrong choices and decisions. IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT MONEY.
    Damn just how much have I have to lose due to unforeseen circumstances
    which is deemed fucking bonus when I had all things that I ever wanted.
    I would have use that cash and sincerely gave it to that old lady who
    sells mini goods and provisions items at the traffic light area
    between Heeren and Cineleisure next to California Fitness.
    I hell fucking aware that there are others in a much worst situation than me.
    Take it for an example that old lady is in a terrible state than any of us here.
    Be it myself, you, the president or anyone else walking along orchard road.
    We carry big bucks in our wallets for shopping, our own enjoyment, fun while
    that lady there doesn't have a single penny and probably her son/daughter had
    abandoned her to support herself in old age with no financial/money supply.
    Fuck. I feel so ashamed,     disgusted at my own self whenever
    I pass by that old lady that I can't even give a simple donation
    while I'm here wasting money on     non-beneficial time-wasting without
    output or end-product due to my fucking stupidity of not being able to think
    and make rightful decision at difficult times thoroughly when it could help that
    old lady last about a week or two to spend on daily and healthy
    with that sum of money. No matter whatever excuse or reasons,
    I still decided to give a small token of donation whenever I can to help.
    This is all something that I'm always thinking about now.


    We are horrible people.



Thursday, 06 August 2009

  • HOLYSHITIMBACK!


    HELLO!
    It's good to be back OTN!
    (On The Net)
    Maybe you guys might be wondering where have I gone to or disappear on the
    net.     Well, the reason is simple. BLOODY MONITOR DIED AND REFUSE
    TO     BULGE OR SHOW ANYTHING ON THE SCREEN! How many weeks
    have I been cut out from the internet world huh.     About 3 fockin' weeks
    imagine that. Like being shut inside a room with a tv and ps2, no new games.
    Like having your wings cut-off when you're meant to fly and be together with
    your flocks of birds. Hahaha     ain't sure what's that suppose to exactly means
    but you get the picture.. right? No connection to the outside     world at all,
    being so OUTDATED. with only handphone which I RARELY use to contact
    anyone except for     close buddies. The most important thing is = I CAN'T
    WATCH PORN AT ALL. Seriously that's     the worst ever thing that can
    ever happen. Havta rely on old vcd stash and a DVD player,     watching the
    same damn scene over and over again. -_-" Haha. Sedih pe hidop. LOL.
    Now, I'm taking my time updating everything up step-by-step. Yeah I'm
    slow. Emails, pictures,     manga, videos, anime, informations, messages and
    bla bla bla bla. This is what is like being so outdated, obselete,     don't
    have a fucking idea what's going on outside and what's the latest trend,
    IN-things, fashion scoop.     Okay no. Haha ignore that but I'm feeling kinda
    happy and cheerful all of the sudden.     Well, wanna know what I'm up to now?
    No not watching porn obviously.     Just nothing absolutely nothing. Staring
    at the screen and don't know where to even begin     updating. lol. Seriously I
    need help. I can't decide. I always have troubles when it comes to decision
    making,     deciding, choosing which is better to do or pick. Please help..
    anyone..?  I can't seem to move on forward. :(     lol.

    Alright in case of people wondering what i'm up to in life,
    Working in PSA now.     Tanjong Pagar Terminal, as a lashing specialist
    on the ship wharf. No idea what the fuck is that     job about?

    See the metal steel bars on the red railing.
    I havta fix that thing. Some sort like this.

    Heh it ain't easy as it looks when safety is concern.
    Very tough and tiring dirty job for a toughguy. lol.
    Imagine doing this much in the picture below.

    See the steel bars form an X shape on the first botton row?
    On these kind of ship if it happens to dock at the wharf site you're station at.

    Give me a few weeks/months. I'll become or look like this.

    With tattoos, lighter colored skin and a white helmet on.
    Just focus the arms. Hahaha.

    So yeah a dirty, greasy, sweaty, toughguy job that not every guys can do it
    if ain't mentally strong and still breastfeeding on mommy's nipples.
    Gimme a month, probably I'll be darker or maybe over-tanned.
    Oh well guess i'm gonna be in 2-toned color for a very long time.
    And if the job is not done properly and tight, This is what will happen.
    And also many other very weird stuff that will left you thinking. Heh.

    That explains where have I've gone to all these while. Now I have a life
    to busily work with. No longer rotting home feeding off mum's $$,
    growing fat when I never even gain a KG by staying home too much.
    Well guess I'll try my best to keep in touch. For now I'm hitting the sack
    early working 12hour shift starting tmr onwards. See you guys around yeah!
    Maybe vivocity or sentosa, I'll bring the ship I'm onboard there. :)
    This blog won't ever never ever be dead or going anywhere else.
    Change of blog links everytime like changing underwear after leaving
    a stain on it. Hahaha but they have their important reasons behind it.
    This blog will ONLY be dead when I'm dead, met with a accident,
    natural death or the death of the internet.  It's like a life diary and
    probably I'm bringing it to my grave. Heh I always change my style,
    every entry varies to another in terms of the way i blog and convey
    my words. Even if there's lots of spelling grammar errors, ain't a
    pro english-speaking malay/indonesian mafuck who scored C6 for
    O's english. And I noticed that some sentence might be hard
    to understand cause I tend to flipped the position of my words, some
    sort like Yoda conversation but not exactly. Few people may
    have a hard time understanding me when I suck big time at explaining.
    But it's readable i think. lol. And I'll keep updating! Slowly..
    Hahaha.


    Till then,
    till I have something to say..



Tuesday, 30 June 2009

  • 300609


    The most expensive present I ever bought for myself with Irwan's help.
    Contented with what it is now. Decals & no. 27 will be change one day.
     Heh. There's an important purpose behind this bike though. :) It may look
    quite short in the picture I'm sure. But just try to sit at it if you're
    confident enough you can have both feet flat on the ground.
    Nyahahahaha! Oh yeah Irwan is the owner of this bike.

    And damn, thank you guys very much being there
    in Newton Circus for the big eat out. Haha I ate
    till my full and was kinda drowsy after that. Even
    if I don't expect a celebration at all, I REALLY
    APPRECIATE IT YOU GUYS! No words can
    describe how I felt. :) Hahaha I'm not used to
    birthday presents and celebrations. but after end
    of the day, I feel so glad. I've turned 19 now,
    I feel so old.
    LOL~


    THANKS AGAIN ALL OF YOU OF THE WISHES!
    SAYANG YOU ALL. HAHAHA!



Sunday, 21 June 2009

  • Father's Day.

    Thank you for being tough and harsh, not spoiling me
    at a very young age till I became what I am today.
    I'm proud and grateful somehow even if I wasn't granted
    a rich happy wonderful childhood. Taught me how to
    grow up on my very own two feet when I was just a child
    who only knows how to ask for things and cry all the time. And
    I've brought disgrace as the only male child upon your name.
    I've grown to be so useless and stupid over the times as I grow older,
    can't even make mother's wish to come true. I have not yet
     been in control of my life independently enough as a man that you
    wanted me to. This time, I won't make anymore disappointments
    in life. You will always be remembered at the back of my mind
    and close to my heart. But you won't ever know my feelings
    and thoughts towards you even if I had hated you once
    during my childhood years. I'll visit you soon to offer my
    prayers which I never done so for the past 5 or more years,
    by myself.     Still remember the one thing you taught me about,
    Real men don't cry. I'm still trying not to.

    If you're here now, I'll lead a very different life than this. I won't know everyone,
     even my friends and my past loved ones that I have in memory. Probably
    end up somewhere in someplace with a different personality
    than the ones I have in me now.

    The loss of the ones that I hold dear affected
    my life heavily. I will not grieve anymore.
    Never again.


    Happy Father's Day.



  • Visit sexxxblast's Xanga Site
    • Name: Mizam
    • Birthday: 6/30/1990
    • Gender: Male
    • Member Since: 6/30/2008

The Infomation

The Description
The negative sadistic evil dude who has issues with himself.

The Contacts
Myspace
Ragdoll Epilogue

The Memory Shopping Cart

Metal Mulisha Team Cap
Black Longsleeve
Bandana
4GB IPOD MP3
Boardshorts
Blue Washed Levi's 501
[CBR] Ring 2.0mm 12gg
Boxer Briefs
Black/Red Headband
SUPRA SKYSTOP
Long/Short Sleeve Buttondown

LONG-TERM-MUST-HAVE
Dynamic Microphone
Yamaha DT200WR/WR200
External Hard-Disk XXXGB
iMac
(Fur-On-The-Hood) Jacket
Dreadlocks

The Disclaimer

I blog about crap in most of the posts. Yeah unique crap. There's many unnecessary stuff in the older entries that it's worth checking out if you like what you're reading. Heh.

If there's something mentioned in the entries that you might feel to be similar or related to you, maybe it really does. lol. Jangan nangis ah siot. xD

The Past Archives

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